How many times (almost daily for some) do you get caught up mentally spinning on something that you clearly know is a complete waste of your time? I’m not referring to acts of mentally testing something out and constructing a new idea that ended up not working or not representing what you would consider to be a viable alternative. Failing is never a counterproductive proposition – it’s a learning experience. I’m talking about a useless mental rehash of what you’ve deemed as a negative experience of sorts which you’ve already gone through. This is the “would of, could of, should of” syndrome that we humans are masters at engaging in.
The Problem
You’ve gone through an event, something that went seriously south in your life or in your endeavors. Although you’ve already paid your mental and emotional dues on this event, you choose to keep replaying thoughts of the incident or interaction. It continually resurfaces, and by “choosing” to let it play out “once again,” you lose some of your most precious commodity, your time, by re-thinking and reliving something that clearly did not serve you in any way. More importantly, you’re not only losing precious time on this, you lose your focus on whatever you were engaged in at present…a one/two punch to any quest for self-improvement.
The Solution
Learn to step up to the plate when you’re caught in the redundancy of counterproductive or pointless thought patterns and immediately change the script by refocusing your attention, and here’s how you can accomplish this.
First and foremost, try to heighten your awareness to when this mental idiosyncrasy begins to surface. When it does surface, create a catch phrase (Here I go again, or, Enough of this) to stop it in its tracks – a simple technique to get you to talk to you right “in the moment” to remind you to move on to something else. The phrase is simply a verbal trigger to shift mental gears and move on to something of a more productive nature. What you’re actually engaging in here is self-directed neuroplasticity, a more formal term for the brain’s ability to rewire itself which is well founded in scientific literature. Being adept at positive forward momentum many times centers on being aware of what to side-step, and more to the point of this article, what to mentally leave behind.
Some Thoughts
I’m confident that anyone reading this is familiar with this cognitive and emotional waste of time I’m referring to. It’s pervasive in our culture for whatever reason. I most certainly have fallen to it on all too many occasions which is why I personally decided to take action on it, and chose to bring it to your attention as well.
There is a simple concept at play here. You have to change your mind (or the script) to change your behavior. My belief is the challenge in this endeavor might be more about “allowing” yourself to change the script, not your inability to do it. Your mind can exert a powerful grip on what you do, but only if you let it.
This newly formed ability to change the content of your thinking on demand may transfer to other cognitive subject matter as well, thus leading to a more open approach to your thinking. Said another way, you’ll start to be more acutely aware of irrationally placing judgment on something or someone, or yourself for that matter, which has a great deal to do with the action you’ll choose to take. You can start altering irrelevant and typically unquestioned memories and images that have counterproductively driven you for far too long.
